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Sunday, November 05, 2006

faith, hope, and love;

and the greatest of these is love

That may be true, but I can't help but feel that of the three, the most important is hope, because without hope there is nothing. During my deep dark days of depression many years ago, I had no faith, and love (whether my own or someone else's) was not enough. Only a tiny desperate flicker of hope that things would get better could save me. And it did, eventually. Hope, and then grace. But not faith, and certainly not love. Not initially anyway.

6 Comments:

Anonymous Basil's mom said...

This entry is particularly relevent to me now. I know you understand why. My faith has not come through my recent tragedy untouched. The hope is there and the love. Faith can not exist without these and so I wait for my faith to come back. ...Thank you for your interesting, fun and hopeful (italics for emphasis) blog.

November 13, 2006 5:51 AM

 
Blogger KJ's muse said...

Hi Basil's mom,

Yeah, what happened was so unfair. I'm positive though that with hope and love already present, your faith will return. It'll just take time. Hang in there!

November 15, 2006 6:50 PM

 
Anonymous mum of two said...

You scare me a bit CMom. I read an article the other day which said "...it's hard to tell whether you're depressed, pessimistic or just a surly b@stard with a bad attitude..." In my case this year I think it was a combination of all three + a LOT of stress. Reading your brief entry re-inforces what I've suddenly realised - even in the depths of despair and confusion, we are not alone and that it's NOT demeaning to ask for a helping hand. So I vote for love AND hope AND faith. What is one without the other? To Basil's Mom I can only say that a lot of hearts grieve with and for you but when I planted out my herbs last weekend I both cried and smiled in her memory.

November 17, 2006 7:43 AM

 
Blogger KJ's muse said...

Hi mum,

That quote was funny, and probably true. I do think that pessimism and depression can reinforce each other, and in my experience generally optimistic people aren't as prone to getting depressed. I'm sorry you've been having a bad year—hopefully 2007 will be a better one!

Yep, having all three would be ideal, but I think hope is always a good starting point. And you're right about the helping hand bit. Having battled depression myself I know that one of the key warning signs for me is wanting to withdraw from people even more so than my introverted nature does already, and this of course just makes it worse. But it's hard not to do.

Hey, just finished reading a great gardening memoir: The $64 Tomato (How One Man Nearly Lost His Sanity, Spent a Fortune, and Endured an Existential Crisis in the Quest for the Perfect Garden) by William Alexander. Highly amusing. I think you'd like it.

November 19, 2006 2:14 PM

 
Blogger Kitty Cats Corner said...

I just lost my mom 3 wks ago today.

I feel myself being depressed and cant snap out of it. Try as I may. Is that why I have been withdrawing from everyone lately? I feel myself doing it and it is so unlike me not to want to be social, but lately, lately I dont want to talk to anyone or see anybody.

I dont know what to do.

November 22, 2006 12:19 AM

 
Blogger KJ's muse said...

Hi KCC,

I'm not surprised—it's only been three weeks! You're grieving, and that's not something you just snap out of, or should even try. Your feelings are a natural response to the loss of your mom, and they will run their own course in their own time. I wouldn't worry too much about not wanting to be social for a while, and unless that phase doesn't end at some future point that you think is reasonable, I would simply respect the process. Hope that helps!

November 22, 2006 4:00 PM

 

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