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Saturday, June 09, 2007

dutch-canadian humour

My sister sent me a list her daughter found on Facebook that made me laugh, and I thought I'd share a few of the items. Unfortunately though it probably won't make much sense to anyone who isn't Dutch, snort, and some of the items are definitely stereotypical, but I thought I'd post it anyway. ;)

You Know You're of Dutch Descent When

- you never trust that the yogourt or margarine containers contain what the label says
- most North Americans (other than those of Dutch descent) can't pronounce your last name
- you know doughnuts have nothing on oliebollen
- you know the only speculaas worth eating are the windmills because they're good luck
- you put sugar on bread with margarine
- you love Maggi in your soup, even if it doesn't need it
- you can say the Dutch 'g' that a lot of others can't pronounce
- you use untranslatable words like appelflappen and gezellig
- you're asked for your last name and you spell it instead
- you can say achtentachtig prachtige grachten without sounding like you have a hairball in your throat
- you brought beschuit met muisjes to school when you had a new brother/sister
- you have so many coupons they keep building up and there are too many to look through
- there is a calender in almost every room (including the bathroom) and at least one of the calenders is a 'birthday/anniversary' calender
- you are too cheap to pay for cable cause you can get 4 channels for free with bunny ears
- you have a special knife that you only ever use to cut cheese and you call this knife a kaas mes
- you like coffee that's way too strong
- you hear all the 'new ways to save energy' and you yawn and say "I've been doing that all my life!"
- you're not allowed to have both meat and cheese on the same sandwich
- you go sightseeing and only attend things that have no charge
- you have 500 rolls of toilet paper in your house because they were on sale!


Anonymous krissa said...

Hey, I must be a little Dutch too, some of these sound just like me! And I was LOL on the last point about the t.p.. :)

June 10, 2007 12:58 p.m.

Blogger KJ's muse said...

Well, by the power invested in me (none), I declare you to be an honourary Dutchie! ;)

June 10, 2007 8:39 p.m.

Anonymous krissa said...

Thank you! I promise to live up to the honor. :)

June 11, 2007 8:34 a.m.

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Although I'm not Dutch, I found some of these very funny.

"- you are too cheap to pay for cable cause you can get 4 channels for free with bunny ears"

Yes, until we got Internet and cable in a package deal.

"- you have 500 rolls of toilet paper in your house because they were on sale!"

Well, no, but it reminded me of a story about my cousins I like to tell every now and then. A major drugstore chain had a sale on toilet paper with a limit to the number of packages each customer could purchase. Well, the whole family (must have been 4 or 5 of them at the time) went shopping together and each one went to a different check-out with the maximum number of packages of toilet paper. And I bet they went to more than one store too.

June 11, 2007 4:21 p.m.

Blogger KJ's muse said...

Funny story anonymous -- thanks for dropping by and sharing! :)

Just bought 30 rolls of TP myself the other day because it was such a good price! But only one pack cuz I was walking. And while I don't have bunny ears, I still get my four free channels. Oh, and whenever anyone asks for my last name I automatically spell it instead! :))

I'm counting on it Krissa. ;)

June 11, 2007 10:20 p.m.

Anonymous krissa said...

That is an hilarious story from Anonymous! ... Does it count that I don't trust the expiration date on yogurt, margarine, etc.?

June 12, 2007 5:08 a.m.

Blogger KJ's muse said...

I don't trust those stupid dates either. In fact, I usually ignore them and am still alive to tell the tale! ;)

June 13, 2007 3:16 p.m.

Blogger Dakota said...

Okay, I am starting to worry now! Like most of you know I am Dutch, but I don’t think I am like this. I guess I’m not typically Dutch!

Love the list though, it’s funny :)

June 15, 2007 7:29 a.m.

Blogger KJ's muse said...

Actually Dakota, I think you probably are. I had a note in the draft that said something to the effect of the list probably applying more to Dutch immigrants here in North America than to people living in Holland, and maybe I should have left that in! ;)

June 16, 2007 7:57 p.m.


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